Dealing with loyalty conflicts in the workplace

You may encounter loyalty conflicts within yourself or because an employee comes to you with one. It may also be a conflict between employees, between teams, or perhaps you yourself have ended up in a conflict.

When this happens, it is important to be aware of your individual patterns in your life. How have you learned to deal with conflict? Who or what do you subconsciously connect with? Who or what are you subconsciously protecting? Your personal experiences subconsciously influence your behaviour in the conflict. By being aware of this, you create more space within yourself and increase your options for action. Moreover, this space can also give rise to interest in the personal experiences of the other person who is subconsciously involved.

In addition to this personal level, it is helpful to also be aware of the effect of patterns in the team and the organisation. Perhaps you and/or employees have ended up in a conflict because you are both subconsciously connected to a different customer group or product. Subconsciously, you are seeking clarity in the order of things through conflict: what is our number one priority?

As a leader, conflict challenges you to speak out about the order of customer groups, services and/or product lines. As a leader, you can look ‘deeper’ into the organisation. What is using the conflict to come to light?

A special vigilance is required when dealing with rebels and whistleblowers. In general, a person would rather remain part of a group than be ostracized, with all connections severed. A rebel and a whistleblower, for whatever reason, are willing to take this risk. So, listen carefully to what this employee is consciously or subconsciously loyal to. Apparently, this is worth a great risk!